I am 3 months away from finishing my PhD in [Life Science] at a top tier research university. I'm married, with a 3 year old son, 2 dogs, and a house in the suburbs. I also have a number of values, passions, interests, and hobbies that I have no time left for. So I'm trying to revive this blog to explore the challenges of balancing a career in science, a family, and just generally being a whole person. Feel free to email me at aspiringmommyscientist at gmail dot com.
Monday, February 22, 2010
13 Weeks, 3 Days
My first trimester screening tests came back perfectly normal and healthy, and the angle of the genital tubercle suggests it's a girl. I did some Pubmed searching and those early ultrasound gender detection methods seem to be about 80-90% accurate. I'll be thrilled if it is a girl, as will my mother-in-law (who has no daughters or granddaughters), but I'll have to be on guard for all of the pink frilly gift outfits I don't want to dress my daughter in... :-P
Alright, that's all I have time for now. Drop me an email if you miss me! ;-)
Friday, January 29, 2010
10 Weeks
:-P Oh well, here's today's update:
I made 10 weeks today, the beginning of the fetal period and
quarter-of-the-way mark. I'm still feeling reasonably well, although
I'm very tired, starting to experience some round ligament pain, and I
actually threw up for the first time in this pregnancy last weekend.
I mentioned a surprise visit from my dad last week, and that was fun,
although unexpected and without much warning. :-) He's just
spontaneous like that sometimes. He wasn't particularly worried about
my mom's organic food kick (have I mentioned she thinks her grandbaby
is in mortal danger because I don't eat organic?), but he did express
some concern about raising a baby in my dirty house. (Don't tell
Hubby...he's the only one who does any cleaning and would be so pissed
that Dad found his work inadequate!) I'm a big believer in building
the immune system through exposure to plenty of germs and allergens.
:-) Ah well, to each his or her own.
My work-life balance advocacy crew is also making great progress on
pushing that grad student parental leave policy through. We have a
meeting with the assistant dean next week and are working on
scheduling one with the head of the new work-life center soon.
Everyone has seemed so supportive so far that I'm feeling pretty good
that it will actually be implemented without much of a fight. W00t!
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Wednesday, January 20, 2010
8 weeks, 5 days
from my dad, but all is well and I'll catch up more over the weekend.
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Tuesday, January 12, 2010
7 weeks, 4 days
Thursday, January 7, 2010
6 weeks, 6 days
I'm thinking of telling Beloved PI this weekend (after confirming everything is good, before anyone else at work finds out, and over the weekend where there are fewer people around and he has some low key time to process). I expect somewhat of a mixed reaction from him. He'll be happy for me, because he has his own precious little girl and knows I've wanted a baby for a while, but he'll be upset at the prospect of losing me, if only for a couple of months, and he'll be terrified about affording to pay me during my maternity leave, since the last big grant runs out right around my due date. I'm sort of assuming the graduate division will take care of it, since they guarantee my stipend for 6 years of adequate progress (I'll be starting my 6th year then) and have a "recommendation" of 6 weeks paid maternity leave in the student handbook (which my advocacy crew is working to extend to the whole grad school as a minimum of 8 weeks for both parents). I'm hopeful that we can work something out, one way or the other, by starting as early as possible.
Anyway, any suggestions on breaking the news gently?
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
6 weeks, 4 days
whole counting from last menstrual period thing makes it seem like
time has just flown by. :-P Anyway, I'm still feeling pretty good.
I've been a bit nauseas at times, but no vomiting. Shall I spare you
the details of my yuckier or more private symptoms? I think so. The
grad school related bits of the experience will presumably be more
interesting to my readers, right?
Still haven't told anyone at work, and I definitely won't until after
tomorrow's ultrasound confirms a heartbeat. I thought I'd wait for
the end of my first trimester, but people keep telling me they'll know
long before then. I figured as soon as my symptoms start to interfere
with my work, or I start showing, but I may decide to tell my PI even
before that. My thinking there is to hopefully get him to stop piling
more non-thesis-related work on me every day, but I doubt it will
really work.
I'm expecting (hoping) to get my first publication out before the baby
comes. It should, for one thing, serve as evidence of "adequate
progress" or whatever they call it, in case there ends up being any
debate on my request for paid leave. It turns out that I'm due at the
end of August, the same time as our 2nd R01 runs out, so the graduate
program may have to pick up the slack on my stipend during a brief
funding gap.
My division already has a recommendation on the books for 6 weeks paid
maternity leave, but I'm still hoping we can push this new 8 week
policy through in time, or at least I hope I can argue it successfully
for myself. Six weeks is just such a pitifully short time...the
absolute minimum for recovery from an uncomplicated vaginal
birth...nevermind bonding with the new baby.
So my little work-life balance advocacy crew has accumulated support
for our policy proposal from various other people and organizations
representing women or grad students, and we're just waiting on some
sort of official statement from each so we can present it to the dean.
I also volunteered (before I knew I was pregnant...) to organize a
larger group meeting to find new leaders and get sub-groups working on
other projects. Unfortunately, since discovering my pregnancy, I've
had a hard enough time focussing on work, and I haven't done a thing
on this meeting, preferring instead to chat on the bulletin boards at
babycenter.com all day! <Sigh>
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Sent from my mobile device
Saturday, December 26, 2009
5 weeks, 1 day
pictures of the positive pregnancy test in Christmas cards. :-)
Everyone is very excited for us. I'm going to see my mom's side of
the extended family for the next few days and hope to share the news
with them too.
On an un-baby-related note, the airline lost my luggage yesterday, so
I have no gifts/clothes/toiletries/drugs/cell phone charger. They're
supposed to deliver it to my aunt's house by 3pm, but for now, I
should probably stop running my Blackberry battery down with long blog
posts. :-P
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